It's wonderful what an hour and three authors can do!
13:08
Grace has joined
Fred has joined
Connie has joined
Fred: Hi, Connie!
Connie: Hey Fred :)
Grace: Thanks for coming!
Connie: I love a party13:09
Grace: Current blurb in need of pep:
Stan Marino is a writer with a problem–he can’t find the creative push he needs to fulfill his vision.
One day, the inspiration he’s been seeking finds him, and he thinks his problems are over–but they’re just beginning.
Somebody else is pulling his strings now.
Stan discovers that reality is stranger than he ever imagined, and he, his friends,
and a host of people he’s never met are locked in a life-or-death battle with a vast enemy.
One day, the inspiration he’s been seeking finds him, and he thinks his problems are over–but they’re just beginning.
Somebody else is pulling his strings now.
Stan discovers that reality is stranger than he ever imagined, and he, his friends,
and a host of people he’s never met are locked in a life-or-death battle with a vast enemy.
Grace: So far we've agreed that the last line should be:
13:12 Stan has found his muse, but will he survive it?
13:13 I want us to see this as a piece of poetry. Not with rhyme, but with a rhythm that draws the reader in.
Connie: I like that last line :)
Connie:
13:16 Okay, I don't like the first line.
Fred: Stan Marino needs a muse. He's written himself into a corner again.
Connie: Better
Grace:Good tie in to the title.
Connie: He's written himself into a corner. Again.
13:17 Grace: Yeah!
Fred: Nice.
Connie: Better cadence
13:18 Fred: Or we could use ellipses: He's written himself into a corner...again.
Grace: Now the part about inspiration finding him.
13:19
Suddenly seized by an inspiration that invades his life (...) Connie: What is the inspiration?
Grace: lol that is the question
13:20 Fred?
Connie: The better to help you write my dear...
(snicker)
Fred: Well, there's the inspiration he needs, and the inspiration he thinks he needs, which is the crux of the story.13:21 Grace: We don't need to delineate those in the blurb though eh?
Fred: No
Connie: No-- but it matters with the direction you point folks in.
So they get thirsty for more.
Fred: A shot of inspiration is all he needs to finish his story.
13:22
Connie: Okay-- that's a great second line. Grace: Aha!
13:23 Fred: Connie, where have you been these past six months??
Connie: lol
Fred: Oh, great, now I've found a muse. uh oh.
Connie: Ha!
Grace: Ditto.
Lol, etc.
Connie: Promise-- no evil personality :)
13:24 Fred: That's a relief.
Connie: Here's where a question would work well---
For line #3
Grace: As well as the question at the end? Sure, let's try it.
13:25 Connie: If you're going backcover copy.
Grace: Yep.
Connie: You'll have what-- 5? 7 lines?
Grace: Something like that. I'm flexible :)
Connie: So try a question. Then another couple of statements, then your line at the end.
13:27 Fred: A shot of inspiration is all he needs to finish his story...where is he going to find it?
Grace: Finally, it comes. But why is it taking over his life?
Fred: What Stan doesn't know is that his inspiration has found him, and it's about to take over his life.
Grace:
What Stan doesn't know: Inspiration has found him, and it's about to take over his life. Fred: Yeah that's what I was going for.
13:33 Grace: Now something about the life or death battle
13:35 Grace: Ripped from reality, he must band with friends and strangers in a life-or-death battle with a (insert adjective) enemy.
Unpredictable maybe.
Connie: I like the ripped from reality
13:36 Grace: Does that give away too much?
Connie: Not at all-- I think you need it.
13:37 Grace: "stand" is better than "band"
13:38 Connie: Not knowing the story, I want the 'ripped from reality' to keep reading.
Fred: or, He's been ripped from his reality, thrown into a life-and-death battle with a lethal enemy.
13:39 Grace: Ripped from reality, he must stand with friends and strangers in a life-or-death battle with a powerful and unpredictable enemy.
Fred: eh, not sure if I like "lethal"
Connie: Ripped from reality is a good start to that sentence.
Brings the focus to a shift in the story
Grace: Exactly.Fred: Yeah, that grabs the imagination.
13:40
Connie: Merciless enemy
powerful enemy
Grace: Merciless. That's pretty good. What says Fred?
Fred: ooh, merciless. I like.
13:41 Grace: Ripped from reality, he must stand with friends and strangers in a life-or-death battle with a merciless enemy.
Connie: Okay-- good flow on that one.
Fred: friends and strangers is accurate, but it's bugging meGrace: Me too, a little. I could live with it.
13:42 Connie: Another phrase that's more descriptive?
Connie: Ripped from reality, he must stand in a life-or-death battle with a merciless enemy.
Grace: A motley crew?
Connie: Just drop the phrase
13:43 Fred: I think Connie's close there.
Grace: Yeah. But I think the idea of teamwork is a very powerful one. a la Lord of the Rings book 1
Connie: strangers doesn't imply friends
or teamwork
Grace: ok so strangers is out.
13:44 Connie: Maybe that's why I don't like the phrase.
Grace: they sort of appoint him the leader. Not sure if that's any use.
Connie: AHA!
Grace: (I love it when she does that)Fred: was that a light bulb?Connie: Yes :)
Connie: Ripped from reality, he must lead...
13:45
Fred: aha!Grace: Ooo!
lead a motley crew
Connie: Ripped from reality, he must lead a (something something something) in life or death struggle with a merciless enemy.
Grace: That's it...
13:46 Fred: ragtag army? sounds like Battlestar Galactica
Connie: Motley crew is great- but may have rock group connotations here in the USA
Grace: Ok, if you say so
Fred: She's right
13:47 Grace: Ragtag army's not bad.
Connie: I like ragtag.
Fred: though they're not quite an army
Grace: But are they really ragtag? lol
Fred: ragtag band of lost souls?
13:48 Connie: Band of lost souls-- like the sound of that.
Fred: kill the ragtag
Connie: Ripped from reality, he must lead a band of lost souls in a life or death struggle against a merciless enemy.
Against is two syllables.
13:49 I think one might be better.
Fred: fight with, rather than struggle against?
13:50 Grace: how about a confrontation?
Fred: battle with
Connie: I like battle or struggle-- whichever's most accurate.
Fred: battle is more active
13:51 Grace: Okay, battle it is.
Grace: I think we're done! Thanks so much Connie! Fred: Thanks for the help, Connie. Wonderful!
Connie: You're welcome--
That was fun!
Grace: Awesome! We'll hire you again
Connie: Lol
later taters.Fred: bye
Connie has left
13:52 Grace: So the complete masterpiece, ta da:
Stan Marino needs a muse. He’s written himself into a corner...again.
A shot of inspiration is all he needs to finish his story...where is he going to find it?
What Stan doesn't know:
Inspiration has found him, and it's about to take over his life.
Ripped from reality, he must lead a band of lost souls in a life-or-death battle with a merciless enemy.
Stan has found his muse, but will he survive it?
A shot of inspiration is all he needs to finish his story...where is he going to find it?
What Stan doesn't know:
Inspiration has found him, and it's about to take over his life.
Ripped from reality, he must lead a band of lost souls in a life-or-death battle with a merciless enemy.
Stan has found his muse, but will he survive it?
13:53 Fred: Ok, that's a lot more gripping than where we began.
Grace: It's the true essence of the tale.
13:54 Fred: I think it works. What do you think?
13:55 Grace: It's awesomeness!
Fred: Or, Awesome Sauce, as I heard somewhere a few days ago.
13:56 Grace: Ha!
Posts
If I do say so myself, we were totally awesome and stuff :)
ReplyDeleteThat was a ton of fun. Grace and I were hemming and hawing there for a few minutes, but when Connie jumped in, it was like lighting a fuse. Sometimes adding another person to the conversation makes a huge difference.
ReplyDelete